Interessant

Day 4.

Thursday a.m. 

I woke up on Thursday, 23rd October to a message from a friend I'd met the week before. A last minute invitation to the Francis Crick Institute for the Wellcome Photography Prize exhibition ended up with a catch up at the gallery's cafe. We have one of those adult friendships where you meet 2-3 times a year, filling in the gaps over congenial conversation and hot drinks. He was about to propose to his girlfriend! He had a whale of a time visiting Japan! He had just set up his photography practice! I love seeing his work grow. There's a beautiful spark that exists in the space between discovering and doing. I'm one of those believers of sharing creativity -  you never know how it might inspire, or what it could lead to. In any case, a small bit of last week's positive chat found a way back to me in a simpler form.

The fact is, I've gotten so many messages like this over the years, and I've aways dialled them down out of some weird strand of modesty. The most I've ever marked them was with screenshots on a personal album in my previous phone. In reclaiming myself I think I'll start recording them again for safekeeping, and to celebrate who I've grown to be on my own terms. I've acknowledged my ego and my instinct for self preservation, but the act of being self celebratory (the genuine, uncool, giddy kind, not the bravado, performative LinkedIn kind) is an area I'm learning to inhabit wholeheartedly. 

Thursday p.m. 

An acquaintance had his exhibition and book opening at Aperture Gallery this evening. His work celebrates his Journey to West, moving to the UK from Singapore around ten years ago. It's a large photo book, with over 20 black and white images, culminating in a volume that he'd worked on for about four years. A previous meeting had detailed how the process involved tedious sequencing iterations, sourcing manufacturers, and design details - but he'd had help from his publisher, Setanta Books. I entered the event with a deeper purpose of meeting them, because there's an idea whirling at the back of my mind, and I have to realise it somehow. The brief acquaintance led to an email exchange, and an Instagram DM the morning after. All good tidings, but genuinely, I know there's a lot of work to be done yet on my end. 

Backing up to the opening - upon arrival, I had that regret of entering a space alone and had to pretend to look occupied (frantically texting M to come faster). 5 minutes later, a mutual introduction to a group of other Malaysians led to a wisecrack exchange of career backgrounds, and I was making new friends in stride. It's normal if it weren't for the fact that it's bizarre presenting my introductory accolades. If I could, I'd bottle up the feeling of seeing their reactions when I revealed I'm nominated for the British Photography Awards, that I was invited to the Sumud Flotilla, and that I write for Architecture Malaysia magazine. "You're so interesting!" is a complex compliment, but honestly at this point, I'm inclined to live up to it.